New York, September 1-4, 2006 – Labor Day was a lucky holiday for Jessica Simpson fans. Tourists spending the long weekend in New York City got to see the pop singer perform twice, for free – first on Friday morning’s Today show in Rockefeller Plaza, and again at Monday’s taping of the CBS Early Show.

On both occasions, between squawking through her bruised vocal cord, J. Simp drank some unidentified brown liquid on orders from her voice coach. On Monday at CBS, she really seemed to be having respiratory problems, sniffling and coughing the entire time, and noticeably hoarse when speaking. At one point, Jessica had such a violent coughing fit that we thought she might vomit; but she did not. She also inhaled something from a homemade bong-like deivce made out of a funnel on top of a drinking cup.

Between songs, J. Simp apologized to the audience for her raspy voice, and one Labor Day moment we’ll always cherish was when she announced to the smaller-than-usual crowd, “I’ll be right back. I have to pick my nose.”

The smartest dumb blonde in show business arrived an hour late for the CBS taping, but thrilled fans by signing autographs for at least twenty minutes on her way out.