Los Angeles, August 27, 2006 – Although Simon Cowell mightily deserves to be criticized, in all fairness, there is a very good argument in favor of his leaving his shirt unbuttoned at Sunday’s Emmy Awards ceremony. It was 105° Fahrenheit on the red carpet. Literally. While it was a lovely Southern California day, we were baking under the sun, and someone actually pulled out a thermometer and that was the toasty reading outside The Shrine Auditorium. While we felt for the pregnant Heidi Klum, our hearts went out to Ryan Seacrest, whose makeup must have been running rivers.

People started to wonder if the ubiquitous Eva Longoria would possibly miss a red carpet opportunity, but the Desperate Housewives star showed up late, after most of the press had headed inside. Maybe her boyfriend Tony Parker has to drive more slowly with that broken index finger.

We were devastated not to have encountered Tori Spelling, or her mom, Candy; a catfight would have brightened up the evening enormously. (Was Candy crying from grief during the tribute to her late husband Aaron Spelling, or was she crying because Joan Collins, Heather Locklear and Stephen Collins delivered their eulogies with all of the woodenness that reading from a Teleprompter can unleash?)

Mariska Hargitay looked amazingly slim exactly two months after giving birth to son August; he’s “awesome”, she told us. Host Conan O’Brien was reasonably funny, despite his unfortunately timed opening spiel. We weren’t watching the ceremony closely enough to notice that The Office’s Mindy Kaling had a minor wardrobe malfunction. (Possibly, we had fallen asleep.)