February 6-8 – Heard this one yet? Liza Minnelli, Harry Belafonte and Andrew Cuomo go into a tent. Very skinny - emaciated, even – people are walking in front of them. Oh, wait, this isn’t a comedy routine. It’s the very first show of New York's Fall 2004 Fashion Week, held at the tents at Bryant Park. Backstage at Kenneth Cole, we asked Liza if she’s attending other shows this week. “Yes”. Which ones? “I’m not telling.” (Imagine not wanting us stalking her!)

Seen and heard during the weekend: Illusionist David Blaine obviously has a penchant for self-torture – after that stint hanging over the Thames with no food and no shower (yuck) he subjected himself to Jeremy Scott’s over-hyped cheerleader act at the club Crobar.

Hip-hop bad boy Ja Rule and singer Mya royally dissed by the Grammy Awards folks – both were at Luca Luca on Sunday, as the Grammy’s were rolling on TV. Backstage at Luca, author Salman Rushdie saying, “See? I’m just a dresser”, while holding his lady Padma Lakshmi’s white fur and packages as she posed for photos.

At Tuleh, we asked actress Ashley Judd what she wears when she wants to feel sexy. “That would be to bed. And I don’t wear anything.” We bet her husband, Scottish racecar driver Dario Franchitti, thinks that’s one of Ashley’s best looks.

At Imitation of Christ’s 45-seat show, the big scene was at the door with fashionistas fainting to get in. Uber-obnoxious photographer Steve Sands, (if you don’t know who he is, you’re lucky), couldn’t get in, so he called the Fire Marshal, who inspected the Upper East Side private home – where there was plenty of room – and left. “Only the people who need to be there” included Jimmy Fallon and Helena Christensen.

A shout out to the “We’re all from Women’s Wear” dudes who tried to snag our seat at Luca Luca. We’re not, but that seat you’re in has our name on it, and that was our coat you moved off it before you sat down.